Monica Elizabeth Gustavus

Monica Elizabeth Gustavus passed away April 18, 2024 at age 70. She was a wife, daughter, sister, cousin, stepmom, mother-in-law, aunt, grandma, cherished friend and proud volunteer of the Army and Navy Veterans Club in Vernon.

Fancy was not her style. She spent her days satisfied by life’s simple pleasures: sipping morning tea with honey, refilling hummingbird feeders and nurturing her houseplants.

When spring had sprung, she found joy in the melting snow pack rushing down the hill and flooding Lee Creek. At the cabin, she’d be seated in the corner Adirondack chair up on the deck, watching the ducks and frogs play in the pond and the occasional bear wander by. At this time of year, she’d be fired up about getting her bedding plants started in planters, with the usual combinations and always ornamental grass in the middle. She said she once tried to omit the grass, but old habits die hard.

Her best days had hot sun and an outdoorsy element to them. She’d say “Beauty day!” All summer long, Bob and Monica would carry the big yellow canoe to the Kettle River. With her swimsuit straps pulled down to minimize tan lines and her Maui Jim sunglasses on, she’d paddle along, stopping at little sandy beaches along the way. Sunscreen was for sissies. The darker the tan, the better. Kathy Sullivan came from Edmonton for those leisurely floats. Those were the days. Dave Eastmead was a regular, sometimes behaving himself, all of them eventually arriving at the Prospector Pub to embellish stories and watch Monica eat fries.

As winter rolled around, she found her sun and sand in Mexico with Bob, her travel mate and husband of 32 years. In recent times, she was invited for extended stays with lifelong pals Donna and Larry. Monica’s 64-year friendship with Larry started in grade one at Silver Star Elementary in Vernon. How lucky to have had the time together this past winter.

Back in Vernon, when Bob called on the condo landline, we would often hear Monica chiming in from the background on various topics. There were always two people on the condo end of the call, even if only one of them was holding the phone. Years spent in the living room together, Bob snoring nearby and Monica crocheting multi-coloured wash cloths from her leather mission recliner known as “command central” while a British drama played on the TV. Gummy bears to her left and chocolate to her right.

Anyone who knew Monica, knew she could cook. Of her favourites, coq au vin was up there. Not everyone could make a perfectly roasted chicken in a wood-burning stove 14 kms up a logging road, but Monica could. With practice she’d stoke that fire and maintain steady oven temperature. Her trademark was to add lemon and herbs to the cavity, then when removing from the bird, she’d laugh every time at Ian Christie’s line about the chicken being so good because of her secret compost. Monica’s greatest gift to Bob was her cooking.

Being married to a photographer for three decades, she posed for group photos hundreds of times. It was never something she was particularly interested in, but she always played along, then once the shutter clicked she’d briskly exit the frame. Shelves upon shelves of photo albums and slide carousels line the basement walls. Memories of days gone by.

When Bob died in 2022, a selection of those were assembled into a slideshow when friends and family rallied around Monica, both at the cabin and in the backyard of the generous Teha family to celebrate his life. It wasn’t easy for her to say goodbye forever. For the great majority of their marriage, they were retired together so she missed him these last 16 months.

In 2023, newly widowed, she bravely set out to blaze her own trail through BC and Alberta meeting friends and family along the way. With binoculars in hand, she and the Bakers spent their afternoons out spotting birds, confidently identifying tail feathers and beaks. She cherished those visits. Her last stop was the doorstep of Stella, her dear friend and sister-in-law.

Last fall, Monica’s cousins Steve and Terri-Lee along with their family, invited Monica to celebrate her 70th birthday. She wrote later that she “had a birthday carrot cake with cream cheese icing, got hammered the first night, laughed and laughed, had so much fun, stayed up till 2am, was just a really great time because people are so thoughtful.” Additionally, she received many calls and texts from friends and family, saying that she “felt special.” People came through for Monica.

It will be Monica’s funny little preferences that we’ll remember. Like that corn flakes should only be with 2% milk, that a strand of twinkly lights across the junipers could turn her little patio into a magical space, that sage green together with any shade of purple was her favourite colour combo, that tulip-shaped glasses originally sold with mustard in them made the best wine glasses, and that there is no such thing as too many knick-knacks (unless you’re Bob and then there are definitely too many).

Like everyone, Monica needed to belong and to participate. Never was there a better place for her than the Vernon Army and Navy Veterans Club, where she found purpose and pleasure matching winners with weekly prizes of local meat. Thank you to all the friends for welcoming her with open arms. She loved it there. Her birthday is Remembrance Day so the bagpipes played for her too.

The Monica we knew liked to be in a group of rowdy partiers but preferred not to be the centre of attention. It was easy to make her laugh and to have her around. She could be as fierce as the sea when she felt wronged or hurt, but she also wore her heart on her sleeve and would cry easily. She could be so funny saying things like, “First and second wives are okay, but third wives are much preferred.”

Although in her final hours she was scared to have open-heart surgery a second time, we trust she knew there was love all around her. She wanted the best possible outcome, she wanted her life, we know she wasn’t ready to go, which is what makes it hard to say goodbye. In her final days, she had hands-on support from locals Donna, Larry, Leanne, Doug, Nate, Rick, Jim and Dave. That’s the absolute best our distant family could ever hope for. Thank you for your friendship. The Galbraith family is especially grateful to Greg Wishart for his steady support, friendship and guidance.

She is survived by stepsons Robert and Francis Galbraith, their wives Lori and Sheila, grandsons Fergus, Grady, Lenny; sister-in-law Stella Galbraith, her children David and Andrea; sister-in-law Pat Galbraith, her children David and Algo; niece Heather Galbraith and Mick Somerwil, their children Hadden and Rowan.

On the other side, she is survived by her Aunt Ida and her family: Steve and Terri-Lee Jakob, their children Jennifer-Lee, Brandi-Lyn, Jessica, Kris; Randy and Lorrie Jakob, their children Alex, Natalie, Kiersten; Ramona and Brad Nilsson, their children Ashley, Meghan, Taylor; Esther and Bob Pearson, daughter Cherie; Shirley Meister, her children Greg and Jerry; Linda and John Hofmann, Ruth Kotke.

At this time, there are no plans for a memorial service. Please hold a thought for Monica when you find yourself satisfied with life’s simple pleasures like vacuumed carpets, wiped countertops, new blooms in your summer planters, birds at the feeder, a glass of rosé and a competitive game of crib with a friend who has dropped in for a visit.